(Intentionally) Perverted Senryū

“Country song goes… ‘Rain makes corn, corn makes whiskey, whiskey makes my baby feel a little frisky’. [To which] Jack [age 3] says, ‘Mom, whiskey makes babies?!’” ~ from Parenting, by Caroline Bologna

Yep, the coolest members of the human species are wee hysterical fountains of wisdom… who Create the Best (Unintentionally) Naughty Misspellings. Then, we grow up (on the outside), and the hysteria is totally intentional:

 

T is for tatas…
unless it’s cold (and you’re 5),
then T is for tights

beware of tall Dicks
to keep your neck from snapping,
opt for a short John

penis meals are hard
to swallow, it’s quite all right
to spit for comfort

I hope you laughed, my Wicked Luvs…

…life is always more glorious, when you “armor your-Self
with humor”. Trust me. I know things.

Once, I Had Poetry for Breakfast (and for Tea)

I let my breakfast sit for too long and it turned to vine.

nature breeds
wild spidery phonies
on fall weeds

my tea leaves
spring hearts, to help me
warm winter

.
the wee notes…
– I wrote the one-liner this morning, when I reached for a chayote to have for breakfast, and realized it had decided to grow itself a tree. The senryū and haiku, I wrote sometime last month. In the original version of the haiku, the third line includes the phrase “the fall”. I changed it for “winter” because, well… it’s quite frosty outside and my tea knows it.
– for Poets United.