The Truth-Telling Jacket

Greetings, humans. I’ve taken a page out of HRH’s book (if you’ve yet to meet that kitty, you should swing by She Who Seeks). I’m Magaly’s Muse. “She is sleeping right now. Shh!” You might not know this, but my Writer is disgusted by the news. Moi? I am obsessed with it. So… while she slumbers, I surf through real reports that taste disturbingly dystopian. Last week, I read about “a lady” in a truth-telling jacket.

 

This is exactly what happened:

A naturalized U.S. citizen (suffering from selective memory loss) was photographed right after a reporter from Hooey! Magazine asked her, “Is it true that your husband is a dementor wearing human skin?”

The lady seemed to be struggling with the complexity of the inquiry, phrases like Can you define ‘human?’ and ‘Must all of my husband’s hair be technically of this world?’ popped out of her eyeballs.

The reporter wasn’t sure how to proceed. His editor didn’t clear him to discuss popping thoughts of alien hair. He was about to say something nice about the lady’s attire, mostly to stole, but a collective gasp uttered by the sea of reporters standing behind the lady shut him up.

“She’s wearing a Truth-Telling Jacket!” the crowd shouted as one voice.

As the lady placed a hand over the spot where her heart should’ve been and turned to smile at the crowd, the reporter was able to read the clear message spelled by the truth-telling fabric: ‘I really don’t care. Do U?’

I’ve been following this reporter for some time now. He isn’t known for his sentimentality. Still, his eyes were shining, when he said, “Love like this is hard to find. Human or not, those two are made for each other.”

And I think he is right. The lady and her alleged human-skin-wearing-dementor must love each other deeply. Why else would she ever wear fabric that screams her true feelings into the world, regardless of how despicable said feelings might be?

His own show of love isn’t far behind. After a team of ornithologists explained to him that humanity tweets loudest when horrors threaten an innocent soul, he created a caring camp where he isolates children from parents. This isn’t done out of cruelty, of course. He cares hugely. He only wants to study the adults’ emotions at their rawest, in order to mimic their behaviors and become more humane for love.

Many people—especially those who find it hard to breathe through the happiness-sucking fog that follows the couple around—care very much about this issue. And they, too, are wearing truth-telling jackets.

image borrowed from Pearl Jam

 

posted by Magaly’s Muse

This is the work of a make-believe being who suspects someone got drunk and burned the barrier between news, reality, and politics. Names, characters, jackets, events, places, incidents… are either the products of said being’s imaginative whims or used in a fictitious manner. Any resemblance to actual events or persons (living or dead, undead, thought to be undead, or known to be inhuman) is purely coincidental. Well… except the dementors. The dementors are real. Damn you, Dolores!

 

27 thoughts on “The Truth-Telling Jacket

  1. Best post ever!

    And, oh my gosh, I really want to write things on the back of my jacket. like, ‘Is this really happening?’

  2. So nice to meet you, Magaly’s Muse! But I REFUSE to believe for one second that you are a “make-believe being!” That would be like saying that I am a make-believe being too — THE VERY IDEA! *shakes head with amusement* I know we are both totally real — MORE real than these humans can handle!

    I need to find one of those truth-telling jackets in my size. I am MUCH too nice and mince my words ALL the time.

    • It’s glorious to meet you, too, HRH. I’ve been a long time admirer of your, um… minced words. Bwahahaha! Sorry, I just couldn’t type that with straight face.

      You and I both know I am real, but we must allow my dear Writer her delusions–you see, she added that disclaimer after I was done. She’s light sleeper.

      I hope to see pictures of you in your truth-telling jacket.

  3. Loved this humorous essay (one has to laugh to keep from crying)–and the lucidity of Magaly’s Muse. Good job, make-believe creature. You’re more real than a lot of the real.

    • Thank you very much, Ramona. You are obviously an extremely wise lady. For it is true, laughter can keep a mind from terrible doings (and keep a foot from kicking terrible doers, too). And thank you again, for knowing that I am real. 😀

      P.S. My dear Writer says I should welcome you to our cyber-home as well. So… welcome!

  4. I look forward to Magaly’s Muse finding a way to dip her pen into an ink pot! I love her take on the news and the motivations behind it. Would that there were many truth telling jackets available for those we elect to serve, especially when they leave their humanity at the door of the hallowed chambers. Thank you for the lift!

    • I suspect there is no stopping her from posting at least once a week. Since I insist on staying away from the madness, she will find a way to get her say. And who can stop the Muse from saying, right? 😀

      I’m so glad this was a lift for you, too, my dear Sharon.

  5. Just when I thought there was not an escape clause in this insanity driven nightmare, here comes Magaly’s Muse to save the moment. I’ll take as many escape (pronounced es cop a) moments as I can get. This is profound, not profane and answers many of my own musing. Way to go Ms. M’s M. I’m in love in a time of dementor ridden ugly. Bless

    • Dear Ms. Oma Linda, your words mean that world to me. And you are correct and then some–we all need to breathe somehow, and since the stench is getting more intense… we must find other ways not to drown in it.

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