When Terrible Found Me, I Smiled… with Teeth

Dark humor “strengthens your immune system, relieves pain, eases depression” and makes all those ridiculously annoying people, who seem to walk around with a giant stick up their rears, rather uncomfortable… a detail I find freaking hilarious. ~ from The Healing Power of Humor [and moi]

 

If we are friends on Instagram, then you have already glimpsed this. But since I promised I would write a bit more about it, here it goes again, with an extra detail (or 3): I am slightly fascinated by how the chemo cocktail affects the body, and by how quickly the effects make themselves known.

Examples:
– The anti-nausea meds that accompany the bulk of the healing poison grip one’s nether regions (for about a second). The feeling is not exactly painful (not even all that unpleasant *cough*), but it is always surprising, regardless of how many times the quirky meds have previously clenched one’s behind without asking for consent or offering a refreshing beverage.

– Then… comes the high. Mostly from the anti-allergy stuff (lots of anti-stuff during chemo[ning]). Many people (perhaps, even most) get sleepy. Me? No, I get giggly, which makes me laugh at the slightest provocation, and quite often without being provoked at all. And since my nurses are a wonderful riot (and I insist on watching all the funny videos friends post on social media while I am getting my chemo infusions), well… the result is a lot of cackling. I enjoy every minute of it, even the weird looks I get.

– There is wild twitchiness and pains, which aren’t as bad as they sound. Really. Some muscle spasming—around my left eye, in the left side of my back… These are not the torturous neuropathic events (which are nasty). I’m referring to spasms that feel almost like tickles. They go away after I stretch. But… can you imagine the number of funny faces you must make to stretch your twitchy facial beauty? Many. And when you do it in front of the mirror, the doing can get quite hysterical, particularly if you are still riding the chemo high… And yes, by “you” I almost always mean “me”.

Soon, I’ll share a bit about the sexy side effects. Let’s just say that phrases like “Port! Port!” might’ve become safe words. See? Never a dull moment, especially with a sexy Piano Man who dances with me no matter the tune.

 

post-chemo scowling
selfies are quite diverting
when my eyelids hurt

 

When terrible found me,
I smiled… with Teeth.

 

See? with Teeth.

 

What about you, my Wicked Luvs, how do you deal with terrible, when it comes knocking, knocking, knocking… on your door?

 

Creature Comforts

If you are visiting from Poets United, do know that this is not a haibun… it’s a mostly lived tale with a senryu for a tail. I could’ve birthed it as a haibun, but… the Muse wanted a tale… And who am I to deny a yummily wild creature (made of me and ink) her whims or musings, right?

 

And the tale with a poetic tail…

The tooth fairy wears pale green scrubs and glasses so thick that I have often wondered if he can see my brain through my open mouth.

“I have to take the two problem children from the lower back”, he tells me, poke-poke-poking between my gums and teeth with a dental explorer. “Any sharp pain?”

“Not really”, I say, “just a prickly discomfort that suggests a prick is poking my gums with something sharp and metallic.”

The tooth fairy’s assistant pales a bit—she is new. The tooth fairy knows me, so he grins, his magnified eyes making him look like a slightly mad divination teacher.

“We would leave them in, if you didn’t have serious things to deal with soon. You take excellent care of your teeth. But I worry about infection during days you might not be able to floss and brush properly. “But don’t worry, this won’t take—”

I don’t let him finish the sentence. “I need to get something out of my bag first.”

“Sure,” says the tooth fairy’s assistant, bringing me the bag.

I grab my red-eyed raven, give it a little squeeze.

“Great idea,” says the tooth fairy’s assistant. “It’s just a simple extraction, but stuffed animals can be really comforting if that makes you nervous.”

“Certainly,” I tell her, my eyes on hers as she preps me for the extractions. “I love my creature comforts. I can’t think of anything more comforting than visualizing a cute raven pecking on the eyes of my enemies as someone rips my teeth out.”

After that exchange, the only words out of the mouth of the tooth fairy’s assistant were “Suction” and “You are doing so well”. The tooth fairy, on the other hand, uttered many words. Most of them an effort to mask the urge to laugh, methinks.

 

ravens in black lace
conjure creepy-cute comfort
while brewing cackles
Raven by Groovy Gothic

 

the wee notes…
– So, that’s where things are right now. I’m two molars down and a boob to go. They do say that threesomes are lucky, don’t they? 😉
– To those of you following Trinkets and Armor, the prompt posts no longer have a fixed schedule. The next one will probably be posted on Monday or Tuesday.
– Linked to Poets United.